Its A Bird Its A Plane Its..

Risk taking is something that young men do. Little boys, and in fact, not so little boys, their mothers attest, are always coming home with something bleeding, bruised, or broken. They engage in risky behaviors because they want to see if they can do it, they do it on a dare, or they do it to impress their friends; when puberty hits they usually do it to impress girls.

At different times in their lives, most young males will give up their risky behaviors. Indeed, many come to recognize that living life, raising a family, and making the mortgage is risky enough in itself, thank you very much. Young women come to realize that Daredevil Johnny is not the marrying kind and they begin to cast their eyes on some less flamboyant men that can give them the life, family, and mortgage that Johnny never could.

After twenty years or so of marriage a woman knows her husband pretty well. The kids are looking at college soon, life is taking on a less frenetic tone, and there's equity in the house. They've been lucky, things are looking good…

And suddenly her husband has lost his mind.

It starts in little ways; new hairstyle, a couple of loud ties, sucking in his stomach when he walks by a mirror. All that is OK, even cute…then he buys a motorcycle. It's red, it's loud, and he's riding it to work.

Her mother says something about male menopause, but she's worried and not really listening…He's talking about rock climbing, he's joined a rugby team he's taken to dropping by a bar for a quick one after work …and then he rides the bike home when he's obviously drunk.

She loses it and blows up at him. He blows up right back and sleeps on the couch that night.

Actually, for once in her life, she should have listened to her mother. Male menopause, (also called Andropause or viropause) is a very real condition that is just beginning to be recognized and studied by the medical community. Unlike the female version of menopause, that has well recognized symptoms and takes place over a shorter, definable timeframe, male menopause takes place in tiny increments over a number of years. A male, around the age of thirty, starts to lose testosterone, but his testosterone level only goes down by about 1% a year. Gradually, he may notice his libido is decreasing, he may be feeling a lack of bodily strength and he may be having trouble achieving and sustaining an erection.

Reactions to this change of life vary from man to man. Some become reckless thrill seekers, some sink into depression, some commit suicide, many lead lives of quiet desperation, wondering what's wrong with them. Some lucky guys never feel a thing.

What women can do for their husbands, if they are seeing uncharacteristic behavior, is to make an appointment with the family doctor for a physical. It is possible that he is testosterone deficient and/or nursing a depression. Medication and/or counseling can help him in more ways than one.

Recommended Reading

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